Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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