His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
