haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.