Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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