I accidentally had phone sex last night
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
