So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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