i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Girls should come with a carfax report
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Randomize
