the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
