yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
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I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
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My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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