i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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