why do cheetos always look like penises
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
