In America we eat man semen.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize