Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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