Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
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