He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
