That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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