I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize