She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
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