belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.