i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
