her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I need to sanitize my soul.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Randomize
