you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Dicks are not precious.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize