he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
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jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
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You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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