I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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