me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Randomize
