Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
