apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
