there's paper in my vomit.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
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