Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
