Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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