you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
