Where did you get a picture of my penis
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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