Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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