Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
you would pick up someone in the library
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
