Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize