im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
You made out with two different species that night
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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