I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
