Texts From Last Night

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  (980): View more from North Carolina

  you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all

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  (980): you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all http://tfl.nu/ifyj
  Replies (24) Good night (4261) Bad night (834) Order T-Shirt
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.

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  (440): Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing. http://tfl.nu/x35s
  Replies (51) Good night (10096) Bad night (1196) Order T-Shirt
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  (914): View more from New York

  I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".

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  (914): I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit". http://tfl.nu/lyvs
  Replies (19) Good night (6859) Bad night (631) Order T-Shirt
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  she's a dina-saur

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  (201): you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct (973): that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand (201): she's a dina-saur http://tfl.nu/b0aw
  Replies (32) Good night (5279) Bad night (820)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.

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  (757): It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it. http://tfl.nu/6y9b
  Replies (36) Good night (5595) Bad night (989) Order T-Shirt
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.

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  (913): The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up. http://tfl.nu/odda
  Replies (5) Good night (4131) Bad night (764)
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs

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  (307): i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs http://tfl.nu/99qm
  Replies (9) Good night (3233) Bad night (765) Order T-Shirt
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  (940): View more from Texas

  This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing

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  (940): This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing http://tfl.nu/18y7
  Replies (9) Good night (2294) Bad night (871)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??

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  (502): What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."?? http://tfl.nu/h07e
  Replies (25) Good night (1341) Bad night (2519) Order T-Shirt
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter

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  (775): Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls (702): Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter http://tfl.nu/jyvi
  Replies (9) Good night (4544) Bad night (773)
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  (334): View more from Alabama

  My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.

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  (334): My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves. http://tfl.nu/fl2d
  Replies (11) Good night (2874) Bad night (696) Order T-Shirt
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  (646): View more from New York

  I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...

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  (646): I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies... http://tfl.nu/y6hf
  Replies (8) Good night (1767) Bad night (500) Order T-Shirt
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.

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  (407): Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30. http://tfl.nu/fgkn
  Replies (13) Good night (671) Bad night (1062)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.

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  (317): The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today. http://tfl.nu/2j3f
  Replies (9) Good night (2358) Bad night (666) Order T-Shirt
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?

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  (503): In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right? http://tfl.nu/gih8
  Replies (4) Good night (1602) Bad night (818) Order T-Shirt

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