my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize