I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
