Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Randomize
