Capitaan dildo arrescate!
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Randomize