she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
they call him Oral-B. enough said
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Randomize
