I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
