No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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