he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
