Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
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the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
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When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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