I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
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