When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
