Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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