Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
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